Tylenol = The Worst Painkiller EVER.

Tylenol doesn't do shit for me. Not for headaches, not for back pain, not for anything. It seems unfair that the crappiest painkiller on the market is the only one that's available.

I'm not sleeping. I've had insomnia for as long as I can remember, but it's NEVER been this bad. I have to wonder if my sleep became more fitful after S. and I had a gigantic argument over whether or not it was 'normal' for me to be as exhausted as I am during pregnancy or if I was using the pregnancy as an excuse to be lazy. Needless to say, there were a lot of tears with that one. This pregnancy has led me to worry about that stability of my relationship as well. Since the aforementioned fight things have seemed better, for the most part, but I don't feel like S. is worshipping me as pregnant women should be worshipped. For example, I wanted curry and the thai place is six miles away, through a bunch of stoplights. There was no curry for me. Maybe my expectations are too idealized, kind of like the perfect relationship. After all, S. is only human and in his shoes I wouldn't want to go get me curry or bananas at one in the morning either.  All the same.

I hate being pregnant. There I said it. Again. I also find newborn babies to be almost intolerably creepy. The first person to say, 'You'll feel different about your own!' gets punched in the face.

Other things that annoy me: Women who are so fat you can hardly tell that they're pregnant. Also. Idiotic people that think that if you make sloppy joe's with tofu, that's automatically 'healthy eating'.

In more normal pregnancy feeling: Last week we had the first ultrasound done to see exactly how far along I was, we saw/heard the baby's heartbeat and of course got a picture that looked like a peanut. I think that helped with making it more 'mine'. Another healthy change in my attitude that I noticed was that I have no desire to be glib about this child in my normal life. My reaction to serious things normally is to make a joke about them. I don't really feel the desire to minimize this child by doing that...